Chapter Eight: Take the Blackpill

He’d never actually posted in Reddit. He’d dropped a comment here and there. He made use of the upvote/downvote system. He’d never written a post. But here it was, three-thirty in the morning and he was still awake, still jittery, still wondering what in the ever-loving-fuck was wrong with him. He was a virgin at twenty-three years old. A fucking pathetic virgin who could barely talk to a female. That wasn’t normal. Couldn’t be normal.

Even if he ever managed to get a girl interested, what was she gonna think about him being a virgin? She’d probably think something was wrong with him. She’d probably think he was a total freak. If he did ever get a girlfriend, maybe he should pretend he wasn’t a virgin. Maybe he should act like he had all kinds of experience. Would he even be able to do that though? He knew how sex worked in theory, obviously. Like any other dude with an internet connection, he’d been known to fap to degenerate shit on pornhub. Just because he’d seen other people do it, didn’t mean he’d know exactly how to do it himself when the time came. If the time came. He shoved that thought aside. When. When the time came, he didn’t know if he had the option to fake experience. He might mess up, do something wrong, have to ask the girl for help.

This terrifying thought had kept him up. He’d paced the basement. He’d gone upstairs and cooked up a second helping of hot pockets for the night. He’d downed them with one hand and completed several missions in Red Dead Redemption, and then shoved his greasy plate into a corner by the couch and paced some more. The worry crushed his bones. The sorrow pounded in his torso, tore at his blood, and rattled his brain. He would never be happy. He didn’t know how to be happy. He hated who he was.

He hated who he was.

He wrote a post on Reddit.

Photo by Junior Teixeira on Pexels.com

r/relationship_advice

So lonely and so worried something is wrong with me Posted by u/thrwawytehdude

First time posting…been lurking foreva. Basically I need to get this off my chest. Maybe tis is more of a vent but if you got any advice for me lay it on me. I am twenty-three. No girl ever looks at me. Anytime I have a crush on a girl, I try to figure out if she is interested and she never is. They always go with the tall muscle head guys. Like this asshole I work with. His brain is nonexistant. He’s this absolute moron who only talks about protein powder and lifting. He has this weird potbelly too. Dude lifts but still has this fat gut and girls still like him because TALL because BIG ARMS. Well I don’t have any of that. I’m avergae height, below average face, and ginger. I look gross. My job sucks. I’m so socially reatrded I’m basically autistic.

I am a virgin at twenty-three and the only gf I ever had was back in high school. I was sixteen and she was fifteen. Never had any chick notice my existance after her.

What can I do to fix this? If I do ever get a girl who likes me will she be disgusted right away that I’ve never had sex? Is she gonna think something’s wrong with me?

Can I fake it? Can I pretend I know what I’m doing?

How do I stop being such a social recluse loser??!!

Somebody help me please! I hate myself and everything about my life.

* prochoicespagetti 63 points

First off, you have to learn to love yourself. You know what RuPaul says “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else.”

  • kenya43 14 points

Don’t think that’s how the quote goes

  • onionshrek 3 points

Most over-rated quote of the century

* panama-anal 54 points

You sound like an upstanding guy. Why are you judging someone just for taking care of themselves? And you don’t seem to have a very respectful view of women. If you did, you’d know that women all have individual preferences. If you don’t have any women who like you, it’s a you problem.

* lamamama 51 points

Found the incel!

  • thrwawaytehdude score hidden

I’m not an incel. I don’t hate women. Just can’t figure out what my issue is. Don’t fucking call me an incel. I’m not crazy. I just want help.

* lamamama 55 points

I look forward to the screenshots posted to braincels.

* throwawayworry 37 points

Have you actually approached any women? You can’t expect women to know you like them if you aren’t talking to them.

  • fantasticman score hidden

This. Despite what women claim, they want an alpha. You have to walk up to them and claim what you want. Extra points if you act like a dick. They love that.

* princeofpussy 33 points

Listen, dude, you don’t sound like a confident guy. Women aren’t all that complex. Just go talk to them, ask them on dates, that’s about all there is to it. If you’re ugly, go for ugly chicks. And make sure you shower.

  • gumarka876 72 points

And leave your waifu at home. Can’t have the ladies getting jealous of each other.

*missesme 20 points

I’m getting such neckbeard vibes from this post. It’s probably the fact that women can sense the desperation in you, and if you don’t like women they can sense that too. Focus on yourself. Have good hygeine. Work out. Go out and build a social life. The right woman will walk into your life when you are ready for her.

* uglyloser 19 points

Funny how everybody on this thread is calling OP out, telling him to shower and change his views on women. Try giving real advice! And yes OP women will be turned off if you tell them you are virgin. Keep it secret. If you manage to get a woman naked, maybe you can tell her then. But probably better to not tell her or you could ruin your chances.

* anonymousdweeb 14 points

Well duh women don’t like you, daywalker. Ya got no soul!

* lawler15 10 points

Women don’t care about looks. Men don’t understand that. We care about personality, character, integrity. If you’re a decent guy, you shouldn’t have an issue getting a girlfriend. And NO! No women in the world care if a guy is a virgin.

  • ihgyskayyyy 2 points

HAHAHHAAAAAA!! Oh man women don’t care about looks? Nice virtue signaling. Here’s your cookie.

* superiorwino 8 points

23 is really old to have never had sex. If I met a guy who’d never had sex at that age, I would have to stop and wonder if something is wrong with him.

* skippitydooodah 4 points

Bruh, just go find some drunk chick and smash. Once you get your dick wet that first time it ain’t nothing.

  • cheeseandricesuperstar 3 points

Exactly. Too many dudes making it out to be some big thing. Have sex and then go forth and be regular.

* blackpilledandpudgy -5 points

ǀ Average Height

Cool, then it ain’t over for you. It’s only over for men under 5’8. How tall are you?

  • thrwawaytehdude score hidden

5’8 actually

* blackpilledandpudgy -3 points

What the fuck are you crying about then? You made the cut. Go slay some pussy.

Adam kept scrolling. He kept reading. A lot of people seemed mad about the way he talked about Josh. They told him he was jealous, that not all fit guys were jerks, that he was projecting, that he was a misogynist, that women could sense this ugly attitude on him.

Scrolling…scrolling

They called him an incel.

He wasn’t an incel.

Just because he couldn’t get laid that didn’t make him an incel!

They told him to be confident. They told him to ask girls out. They suggested places to meet women. They told him to take a shower. They told him to give up anime. It insulted and saddened him that they’d rightfully guessed he liked anime.

And then there were some women encouraging him, telling him they found shy guys cute. Telling him they found gingers cute. That height didn’t matter. That looks didn’t matter. That a man’s job and money didn’t matter.

And at the very bottom of the wall of text, comment after comment built up over the course of the night, the very last comment, having accrued so many downvotes it wasn’t visible and Adam had to click on it to reveal the text and the accompanying irate responses.

* mogspeople -57 points.

Take the blackpill

Photo by sebastiaan stam on Pexels.com

And that was all it said.

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